Monika Suri

‘The Silver Lined Mommy’ It is an eBook which is a self-help book for middle aged women. A woman plays many roles –  wife , mother , daughter and a daughter-in-law . She handles endless responsibilities being a home-maker and a care-taker for her family . Amid all this , a woman’s personal priorities somehow take a back seat . And as she  steps into  the middle age group of her life i.e. around the age of forty , she notices some changes in her body and mind too . Fine wrinkles start appearing , hair start changing  their color to grey , some extra hair growth on face or may be some weight-gain  . She starts to meet a  little different woman  in the mirror. The middle age group also brings some hormone problems which may cause stress . From the author of ‘The Silver Lined Mommy’ Hi ! I am Monika Davessar – author of the  eBook ‘The Silver Lined Mommy’. I am running in my forties and by profession I am working as a lecturer for the last 19 years. Writing has become my i...

 Should you invest time in celebrating yourself ? Is it really  important to celebrate yourself ? If yes , what are the reasons and HOW tips ? We live in  a world which doesn’t pause or rest . Everyone of us is rushing . We are striving for accomplishments , success , growth and joy . See ! Joy comes at the last after accomplishments or success . Actually it has been so fixed in our minds that hard work and accomplishment leads to success . And success would then bring joy . There are people and media daily hitting your minds with the headings like – Achieve as much as you can in a day , Be productive , How to improve productivity , Work on your hobbies , fitness mantras , and what not . You just can’t count them . Everyone is working hard , but don’t you think that you forget celebrating yourself in the process ? When was the last time you paused and celebrated yourself ? Here are the 3 reasons we all should be celebrating ourselves . WHY ‘Celebrating your...

Explore and Exhale Sometimes you need to take out time just for yourself . Yes , only yourself . I am not asking you to work on your hobbies , read a good book or say a kind word to yourself . They are all fine and one should keep doing those things but today is different . Take out , say half an hour , just to sit and explore  . Look for a peaceful corner of your home . Sit straight in a comfortable position . Close your eyes . Listen to some soothing music for the first 2-3 minutes and then all silence . Be aware of your body , your wandering mind and  your breath . Inhale and exhale deep . Feel your breath -in and out . Do you feel good while you breathe deep? If not , change your breathing pattern and let it be normal . Now do you feel better ? If not , find out for yourself which kind of breath is comfortable to you ? Continue a comfortable breathing . I know our  minds have a wandering nature . Drag  your mind back to focus on your breath every time it wanders . Explore your feel...

You are a woman , a mother . Raising your child in a meaningful way is your duty which can be  challenging at times . I know you as a mother are doing the best on your part . You want to raise your child as a  kind , courageous , high performing individual . And you are already working in this direction . It’s important that you as a mother instill some virtues in your child . After all virtues make one’s life meaningful . The most precious treasure is virtue. – Gautam Budhha  Virtue means power, strength, inner quality. Virtues define our character. There is an endless of virtues one should develop in herself and also instill in her child . Kindness, Hard work , compassion , forgiveness ,  spiritual principles , Respect for all , truthfulness , all these are the qualities of a good human being . Here I am talking about just 4 virtues you as a mother must try to instill in your child . But there’s another strong aspect about instilling virtues in your child . Tha...

For the last 3-4 years I started noticing that whenever I did jumping jacks in the gym or skipping , few drops of urine would leak . This forced me to go to washroom many times during my exercise time . Many times the situation embarassed me in front of others working out in the gym . This problem is called Urinary Incontinence . It’s basically a bladder control problem . It can be faced both my men and women .  In simple terms , it is involuntary loss of urine from the body . Common types of Urinary Incontinence among women: Stress Incontinence When bladder gets a pressure – may be by coughing , sneezing ,laughing  or doing some high energy exercises .   Urge Incontinence When you feel a sudden urge to urinate followed by involuntary loss of urine . Functional Incontinence This can happen due to some health troubles which don’t give you enough time to reach the washroom. Factors contributing to Urinary Incontinence among women Pregnancy & childbirth This phase of ...

Stress Management Today ,Stress is quite common with everyone of us . You feel a strange tightness in your heart and mind . Stress management has should become an essential part of curriculum , isn’t it ? What do you think ? Stress is related to both external and internal factors. External factors include the physical environment, including your job,  finances , relationships with others, and all the challenges you face on a daily basis. Internal factors determine your body’s ability to  deal with  the  stress-inducing external factors. Stress can be positive or negative . Positive stress is somewhat good to you – it improves your performance . Just before sitting for an exam or stepping on the stage to speak publicly , the stress you have felt was positive stress . Challenging yourself with daily writing  for whole one month is positive stress . The sense of  accomplishment at the end of the challenge gives you happiness and  motivates you even for more challenges ...

Knowledge is power. As a parent, wife, daughter, employee and a woman these are rights set in place to protect you and it is important that you are aware about these. 11 Rights of Indian women  : 1. Safety at workplace – POSH Act POSH means Prevention of sexual harassment . Sexual Harassment of Women at Workplace  Act, 2013 ensures women’s safety at workplace . Each organisation with more than 10 employees is required to form an ICC (Internal Complaints Committee) headed by a senior female officer. A woman who faces SH at workplace can complaint to ICC within three months .  2. Domestic Violence Domestic violence act 2005 usually protects women from their partners. It also applies to those women who are sisters, widows, mothers or single women. Domestic violence includes actual abuse or the threat of abuse that is physical, sexual, verbal, emotional and economic. An  important feature of the Act is the woman’s right  to secure housing. 3. Right to Equality Equality Act...

The # Covid19 outbreak forced the nation to go into lockdown . Schools , offices , markets are closed for the last many days  . Children are at home and other family members too , apart from those involved in essential services . Being primary care takers of family and home managers , women’s job has turned to be much more than the basic essential service during the quarantine period .  If you are a SAHM your responsibilities have been  doubled up because of more kitchen work and more family care . If you have been a working woman and now-a-days you have to work from home , your responsibilities have been  tripled up . Lockdown 2.0 has started and it’s time to go for Life management 2.0 for women . Woman and Quarantine Quarantine period brings more responsibilities for women More kitchen work Women , being the primary care taker of family , have to spend much more time in the kitchen , fulfilling demands of all family members . Maids’ help is a distant dream but demand...

Perimenopause It is the period of a woman’s life shortly before the occurrence of the menopause.  The transition period of a woman towards menopause , called perimenopause  usually occurs in a woman’s life in her 40s .  In rare cases , it can  occur in late 30s also .  It’s the time when the ovaries gradually begin to make less estrogen. After an average 4-5 years of the transition period of perimenopause , a woman finally reaches the stage of menopause when the ovaries stop releasing eggs . Women in perimenopause stage are known to show symptoms like hot flashes , fatigue , irregular periods ,  thinning of hair , skin dryness , mood swings , trouble sleeping and weight gain too . I have been in contact with few women who are around the age of 45 , they haven’t made any changes in their diet or not living a sedentary lifestyle but still they are gaining weight . I am 42 and  I am having regular periods till now . But sometimes I do notice swings in my mood  and since this lockdown...

I got to attend  a small get-together of few women at a friend’s house . In front of the sofa , she had kept a small white board on a table and it was written on the board – ‘Open your hearts’ I was the new to the group except one who was already my friend . Everyone started sharing their  lives . Happy , sad , troubles – everybody was saying whatever one wanted to . There were more of troubles as happiness is something we keep sharing everywhere – even to strangers on online social platforms . At last it was my turn and I also shared what my heart wanted to . (my friend had already told me that you can share without any fear , nobody reveals your words to anyone out of the group) There was nothing special  about ‘Open your hearts’ –No tambola , no gossip , no snacks but still a lot was there . Some times , there are some aspects of life which trouble us , scare us but we don’t want to talk of it . We pretend as if the trouble ...

Love, friendship, networking – these are all critical connections and the foundation of a healthy, happy life. Networking is very important in professional as well in personal life . At offline level , I won’t say I am  bad at networking but I am not exceptionally  good at it . When it comes to online  networking , I would say I am not good at it . I know I lack online networking skills . It’s not that I am not doing it . I am there on FB, Twitter , Instagram , Pinterest and here also  I  am networking with you all being a  part of month long blogging campaign #BlogchatterA2Z . But still I am not very good at it and I admit that I have never even worked hard for it . Effective networking isn’t a result of luck – it requires hard work and persistence. Networking aspects I am bad at , and need to improve upon : Letting the world know I am blogging for the last three years . But still I find it difficult to post my latest post on my FB profile . I do post it...

The alphabet M instantly clicks in my mind ‘Mera Lifestyle’ . What’s Mera Lifestyle ? Well it’s the positive lifestyle I want for each one of us . Every reader should be able to gain something from my blog and be able to exclamate – Yes ! That’s Mera Lifestyle ! * Mera is a hindi word which means – My Positive lifestyle means a life blessed with fitness , happiness , motivation  and growth . Laws of Mera Positive Lifestyle Be Motivated The basic law to live a positive lifestyle is to remain motivated . Read good books , blogs , connect with like minded people to keep your spirits high always . Actually the motivation is there within you only but you  just need to give it a shake  time to time so that it remains fresh . Be motivated by positive attitude  Prerna  Can you be Pollyanna ? ‘Pollyanna’ word means a very cheerful person . I recently finished a book ‘Pollyanna’ in which a teenage girl named Pollyanna always play...

It’s been 15 years of my marriage, it was an arranged marriage . When I was in college doing my studies , I always dreamt of love marriage , as it happens in DDLJ you know . Kajol goes on a college tour and finds her prince charming who later comes playing mandolin in the sunflower gardens . But nothing like that happened in my life and my dad arranged my marriage with  Mr N  . You can read my whole story here Now  I often tease my hubby Mr N  that I always wanted love marriage but bad luck that  I am still not blessed with love even after 15 years of marriage . Haha ! Well , ours is not a perfect marriage , there have been lot of fights and  anger –over wet towels on bed , finding his white socks under bed and then rubbing hard to clean them , his youtube addiction , his everytime grumble on the feeki chai   issue and a lot more . He finds me too at fault many times – when I ignore dusting for few days , give him   ghiya in tiffin , or when I shout at my maid . He just can’t bear whe...

If i ask a woman over 40  -What are your life goals? The answer may be  : I want my children to study hard and settle well in life . I wish my husband to be always happy at workplace so that he’s happy at home also. I wish to save lot of money . I want to own a big house and a big car . Well, may be your answer is a bit different . But if you analyze the above answers , are these really the personal life goals for a woman ? Just think over . Aren’t these family goals ? Of course you are a unit with your family . So your family goals are your goals in some way . But what are the life goals which you want as a woman ? Which are the goals ,if achieved, can bless you with joy ? Life goals for a woman over 40 40s is the time when it’s been around ten years or more of your married life and your children are around teenage . You may feel worried about their school , marks , higher education in future and the finances involved . If you are living on rent ,  you may feel the pr...

At times , I encounter ‘not feeling good’ days in my life . The reason may be beacuse things didn’t go as i wanted or may be some other reason . I don’t know exactly why ,but those days are there . The day when I felt grumpy morning to evening   We often worry about our  physical well being ,  focus on our fitness ,  reach out to doctors when we face any health trouble , but we forget most of the times to  look after our emotional well being . Emotions OK , Let’s start with a simple question – Have you ever felt any of the following feelings ? Angry Joyful Frustrated Excited Yelling Crying Smiling for no reason You answered Yes , right ? Why not , a human is made up of emotions . These are all states of mind . If you are happy and  calm it means that everything on behavioural level is going on smoothly . But if you experience the negative emotions like anger , yelling , frustration , then there must be something that is not OK on the  behavioural...