Country is locked down and so am I within few square feet of space. After the routine tasks of mopping , dishing , laundry , cooking , sanitizing the nooks and corners of my home , I lighted a diya in my little temple and then sat with my laptop along with TV switched on . I scrolled through various channels ,with most of them showing the Corona news and the lookout for Maulana . The rising number of cases in the various states brought me fear and stress .
I wanted to write my next post for the blogging challenge but nothing came in my mind . I distracted myself by picking a book to read but couldn’t enjoy it . I didn’t even feel like making rice for my daughter in the lunch . Thankfully she is big enough to make it on her own .
The previous night’s dream also kept scaring me till evening . Scientists were making arrangements for sending me in space for their next satellite mission . I was so frightened and kept refusing but they were continually persuading me . They even got a contract letter signed from me and gave me another duty letter to be given at my workplace that I would be under training for next few months . One of them shouted to ask ‘Where is the gas bill ?’ I got confused at the question and didn’t reply . But then he jolted me ‘Where is the gas bill yaar , come on get up.’ Oh gosh ! It was then I realized i was dreaming and hubby was asking for the bill .
Tossing zig-zag in my bed , I watched TV for few hours thoughtlessly . I don’t know Why but I just didn’t feel like doing anything . I once again tried to cheer myself up by writing ‘Cheer Up’ on paper but back at my mind I wanted to ‘Do nothing’
I was thinking to write my G post on ‘Growth’ or ‘Goals’ but my body and mind were not cooperating you know . I had started feeling low and grumpy by evening . Lying for hours in bed had stressed my spine too . My daughter asked me to play with her but I said a harsh NO . When I asked her to make me tea she replied with a harsh NO . Murmuring , I had to make it myself .
Grumpiness was stressing me out .
When I went to the kitchen i saw rice littered here and there as kiddo had made rice in the lunch . Oh Gosh ! Aaj ka din hi khraaab hai , so were the words which came muttering out .
After tea , I was back in my bed , just scrolling my fingers on phone . My body didn’t feel normal .It was warmer and when i checked ,the thermometer showed 99.5 . I quickly messaged my hubby and he asked -Are you feeling problem while breathing also? Please quarantine yourself .
That fired up my grumpiness .
I may feel like doing Nothing at times , I may feel grumpy at times but It’s OK . I embrace my grumpiness .
I read someone’s blog where she talked of ‘Free Write’ . Having loved the idea , I thought of free writing today . So I penned my thoughts the way they just flew out of my heart .
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